Fear Of Change or Change of Fear

There's a quote on Instagram that gets periodically posted that says "Fear of Change is for old ladies". 

Whilst I admire the person who posts it, I respectfully disagree - hugely!

There's a couple of points here, one doesn't have to be old to have fear of change or a lady. But mainly I don't think fear of change is necessarily a bad thing. In fact I think it's one of the most normal and natural emotions that us humans experience. Fear of change is fear of a loss of control, of a loss of what's familiar and even a loss of the fear we actually know, and maybe be semi-comfortable with? You've heard the phrase "better the devil you know".

Personally I think fear of change is normal and healthly because after all sometimes that fear is absolutely justified! How many times have you not wanted to go to a particular party and some well-meaning person (often your Mother when you were younger) would say "you'll enjoy it once you get there" or "the anticipation is always worse than the reality".

Well my friends, I should just like to say I've been to quite a few parties in my life where they were just as dismal as I had feared and I couldn't wait to leave as soon as politely possible!! Just sayin'

In order to help my fear probably about 15 years ago I began trying to reframe my fear, by saying to myself I'll never have to go through this again. Not this exact thing, time, place, presentation etc etc. Maybe a similar experience but not the exact thing - I believe it's impossible :-) It works for me and helps soothe my stress levels when facing change or the unknown.

Fear of change is in my opinion completely normal and not should be derided, scorned or attributed to one section of the population. What I do think is if we can change how we view this fear, by wrapping it in a level of comfort ie I'll never have to go through this again, it can help with the heart palpatations. I think is fear of change is healthy. However, what I do think is unhealthy is not exploring that change, even just a toe dip, it is a missed opportunity.

An opportunity to discover that yep your fear was well founded and it was horrible! This means you can store those feelings or pointers for future situations that will help you to be less fearful and perhaps better prepared. That experience may guide you between two choices? Or unlike my parties, it may turn out to be rather better than feared or even about the same? Again all good memories to store for scenarios that have yet to happen. Fear of change can be used almost as a tool for what's ahead, but only if you actually experience that change.

I won't say embrace the fear (I'm just not that ra ra) but I will say feel it, control it by reframing, then dip a toe and see what happens.

I'd love to know what you think about change, do you love it, do you hate it and how do you manage it?

Look Gorgeous, Feel Fabulous - Sophie

p.s. to all my friends who may read this, please do not uninvite me to parties, I don't get out enough as it is!!!

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