Long-suffering fiancé was talking to some of his relatives and said something along the lines of “with old lead-foot over there we made it in 5 hours, plus we stopped once for the hound”. They all turned to look at me and I said “the roads were clear!” And then one older relative asked, “did you drive?” with a look of incredulity on his face. When I replied affirmative his response was “that’s not right, I would never do that……”
At the time I laughed and we carried on the celebrations but on the slower journey home a few days later I asked my fiancé what was his relative's surprise referring to?
- you are clearly breaking the speed limit and that’s irresponsible and dangerous
- women drivers are rubbish and I wouldn’t trust my journey to a woman OR
- it is a man’s responsibility to take the heavy lifting of travel
Fiancé believes said relative has perhaps a slightly old fashioned view of the division of labour and that he was admonishing fiancé for being so ungentlemanly! I said “hasn’t he met me?” But it was an interesting exchange and one that took me a little by surprise.
For me though it’s also considerably less boring than being a passenger and far from feeling emancipated, fiancé likes to catch up on his iPad so it does suit us. However what the relative hadn’t taken into account that as the driver, hopefully the one in control, I had a captive audience!!
He couldn’t sidle off into another room, sneakily turn up the TV, bury his head in his emails or zoom off to the office – No I had him captured for 5 straight hours and because I was driving he couldn’t “sshh I’m driving” me! Although there were times he did suggest I focus on the driving instead of twittering on about the latest 5:2 article / dress / restaurant / exhibition I had just seen, I managed to update him on all latest concerns, all interesting topics and all my current observations. I don’t think his ears were bleeding when we arrived but he did head straight for the bar …..
So I wasn’t offended at the relative’s remark just mildly amused by it, my Mother is always a little surprised at my driving zeal she thinks it’s a little unseemly for a lady. There is no right or wrong here, just a whatever suits you and your driving partner, but I think I definitely get the better deal ….
Who drives on long journeys in your household?
Look Gorgeous, Feel Fabulous – Sophie